четверг, 28 декабря 2017 г.

The fairy tale Wild landowner

The fairy tale "Wild landowner". Saltykov-Shchedrin. 1869 year.
The fairy tale "Wild landowner". Saltykov-Shchedrin. 1869 year.
In a certain kingdom, in a certain state, there lived a landowner, lived and looked joyful at the light. All he had was enough: the peasants, the bread, the cattle, the land, and the gardens. And that landowner was stupid, he read the newspaper "News" and the body was soft, white and friable.

Only once did this landowner pray to God:

- Lord! I'm all pleased with you, I've been awarded to everyone! Only my heart is unbearable: very much divorced in our realm of the peasant!

But God knew that the landowner was stupid, and he did not heed his request.

The landlord sees that the peasant does not wane with every passing day, but everything arrives - he sees and fears: "Well, how does he get all the goods from me?"

The landowner will look in the newspaper "News", as in this case it should be done, and will read: "Try it!"

- Only one word is written, - says the stupid landlord, - and the word is golden!

And he began to try, and not that somehow, and all by the rule. Whether the peasant's hen will wander into the master's oats - now, according to the rule, it is in the soup; whether the dower or the peasant would be cut off secretly in the master's forest - now these are the most firewood in the manor yard, and with a cutter, according to the rule, a fine.

- I'm acting fines on them now! - says the landlord to his neighbors, - because for them it is clearer.

See the peasants: although the landowner is stupid, and his mind is given a great one. He cut them down so that he had no place to stick his nose out: wherever they look, everything can not be done, but not allowed, but not yours! The cattle will come out on the watering table-the landowner screams: "My water!" The chicken will pick out for the outskirts - the landowner screams: "My land!" And the earth, and water, and air - it all became! Luchina did not become a peasant in the light of the earth, the rod did not become swept away. So the peasants prayed all the world to the Lord God:

- Lord! It's easier for us to disappear and with children with small children, than to die forever!

The gracious god heard the tearful prayer of the orphan, and there was no peasant in the whole space of the possessions of the stupid landlord. Where did the man go? No one noticed, but only people saw when a chaff whirlwind rose and, like a cloud of black, swept through the air masculine peacocks. The landowner left the balcony, pulled his nose and felt: clean, pure in all his possessions the air became. Naturally, I was satisfied. He thinks: "Now I'm going to pour my body white, the body white, loose, friable!"

And he began to live and live and began to think about how to comfort his soul.

"I'll manage, I think, the theater is at home! I'll write to the actor Sadovsky: come, they say, amiable friend! and bring the akterok with you! "

He listened to his actor Sadovsky: he himself came and an actor brought. Only he sees that in the house of the landowner is empty and put the theater and no one to raise the curtain.

- Where did you put your peasants to? - Sadovsky asks the landowner.

- But God, through my prayer, cleansed all my possessions from the peasant!

- However, brother, you stupid landowner! Who are you, stupid, wash your hands?

- Yes, I already and how many days do I wash unwashed!

- So, the mushrooms on the face grow up going? - said Sadowski, and with this word and he left, and the actor took away.

The landowner remembered that he had four generals of acquaintances nearby; thinks: "What is it I all gruppjans and yes graspasjans I spread out! I'll try to play a game with the generals five or two! "

Said - done: wrote invitations, appointed a day and sent letters to the address. The generals were real though hungry, and therefore very soon arrived. We arrived - and can not be surprised, why such a landlord has clean air.

- And that's why, - boasts the landlord, - that God, through my prayer, cleansed all my possessions from the peasant!

- Oh, how good it is! - Generals praise the landowner, - so, now you will not have this smug smell?

-Not at all,- replied the landowner.

They played a bullet, played another; The generals feel that their hour has come to drink vodka, they come in anxiety, look around.

- Must you want to have a snack, gentlemen of the generals? - The landowner asks.

- It would not be bad, master landowner!

He got up from behind the table, went to the closet and took out from there the candy and the printed gingerbread on each person.

- What is it? - The generals ask, staring at him.

- But, eat, than God sent!

- Yes, we would beef! beef would be us!

- Well, I do not have beefs for you, gentlemen generals, because since God delivered me from a peasant, and the stove in the kitchen is unheated!

The generals were angry with him, so that even their teeth chattered.

- Why, do you eat something yourself? - They snapped at him.

- I feed on some raw materials, but I still have gingerbread.

- But, brother, you are a stupid landowner! - Said the generals, and, not having finished the bullets, went home.

The landlord sees that he is being fooled another time, and he wanted to think about it, but since at that time a deck of cards came to his eyes, he waved his whole hand and began to lay out the grasp.

- Let's see, - he says,  -gentlemen of the liberals, who will prevail against whom! I'll show you what the true hardness of the soul can do!

He unfolds the "feminine whim" and thinks: "If three times comes together, then it should not be looked." And as luck would have it, how many times it will not decompose - everything comes out of it, everything goes out! There was not even a doubt in him.

- If, - she says,  -fortune itself indicates, so it is necessary to remain firm until the end. And now, as long as it's enough to lay out grandsons, I'll go and have a look!

And so he goes, he walks around the rooms, then he sits down and sits. And he's thinking. He thinks what kind of cars he will write out of England, so that all the ferry and the ferry, and the serf's spirit so that there is not at all. He thinks what fruit garden he will divorce: "Here there will be pears, plums; here it is - peaches, here - a walnut! "He will look in the window - and there everything, as he conceived, everything is exactly so it is! Breaking, according to the pike command, under the load of fruit, the pear, peach, apricot trees, and he only knows the fruits of the machines and puts them in his mouth! He thinks what kind of cows he will divorce, that no skin, no meat, and all one milk, all milk! He thinks how he will plant strawberries, all double and triple, five berries per pound, and how much he will sell this strawberry in Moscow. Finally tired of thinking, will go to the mirror to look - and there's dust on the top of the population ...

- Senka! - he suddenly calls out, forgetting himself, but then he stops and says,  - Well, let it be for the time being, it will stand like that for a while! But I will prove to these liberals what the firmness of the soul can do!

Promays in this manner, as long as it gets dark - and sleep!

And in a dream dreams are even more fun than waking, dreaming. He dreams that the governor himself has learned about this landlord's inflexibility and asked the police chief: "What kind of hard chicken is your son in the county wound up?" Then he dreams that he was made a minister for this unyieldingness, and he walks in ribbons, and writes circulars: "Be firm and not look!" Then he dreams that he walks along the banks of the Euphrates and Tigris...

- Eve, my friend! - he says.

But I've reviewed my dreams: I have to get up.

- Senka! - Again he screams, forgetting himself, but suddenly he will remember ... and his head will fall.

- What, however, do? - he asks himself, - at least some kind of hard-boiled one brought it!

And that's why his captain, the police chief, suddenly comes to this word. The stupid landowner was unspeakably delighted with him; ran to the cabinet, took out two printed gingerbread cookies and thought: "Well, this one seems to be satisfied!"

- Tell me, please, Mr. landowner, how miraculously did all your temporarily liable people disappear? The police chief asked.

- And so, and so, God, according to my prayer, completely cleared all my possessions from the peasant!

- So, with; but is it not known to you, Mr. Landowner, who will pay taxes for them?

- Pay? .. It's them! it's them! it is their sacred duty and duty!

- So, with; but in what way can you send them from them if they, through your prayer, are scattered across the face of the earth?

- I do not know ... I, for my part, do not agree to pay!

- And do you know, Mr. Landowner, that the treasury without taxes and duties, and even more so without wine and salt regalia, can not exist?

- Well ... I'm ready! a glass of vodka ... I'll pay!

- But do you know that, by your grace, we can not buy a piece of meat in the market, or a pound of bread? do you know what it smells like?

- Have mercy! I, on my part, are ready to sacrifice! Here are two gingerbread cookies!

- You are stupid, master landowner! - said the police chief, turned and left without even looking at the printed gingerbread.

This time the landowner pondered for a while. Now the third person is celebrating his fool, the third person will look, look at him, spit and depart. Is he really a fool? Is it really the inflexibility that he so cherished in his soul, in translation into ordinary language only means stupidity and insanity? and really, due to one of his inflexibility, the taxes and regalia stopped, and there was no way to get a pound of flour or a piece of meat in the market?

And how he was a stupid landowner, at first he even snorted with pleasure at the thought of what he had played, but then he remembered the words of the police chief: "Do you know what this smells like?" - and he was afraid of it.
He began, as usual, to go back and forth through the rooms and still thinks: "What does it smell like?" Does not it smell of watering what? for example, Cheboksary? or, perhaps, Varnavin? "

- If only I could go to Cheboksary!" at least, the world would be convinced, what the firmness of the soul means! - Says the landlord, and he himself, in secret, thinks from himself: "In Cheboksary, I, perhaps, would have seen my dear man!"

The landlord seems to be, and will sit, and again resembles. Whatever comes up, everything seems to be saying: "But you are stupid, mister landowner!" He sees running through the room and the mousy sneaks to the cards, which he made grandshipans and has already fattened enough to excite a mouse appetite.

- Ksh... - he rushed to the mouse.

But the mouse was intelligent and understood that the landowner without Senka could do no harm to him. He only wagged his tail in reply to the terrible exclamation of the landowner and in a moment looked at him from under the sofa, as if to say: "Wait, you stupid landlord!" it's only the beginning! I'm not only cards, but I'll take your bathrobe, as well as you'll pamper it properly! "

How much, if not much time has passed, only sees the landowner, that in the garden his paths are burdocked, in the bushes of the snake and reptiles all the kittens are swarming, and in the park wild beasts howl. One day a bear approached the estate, squatted, looked through the windows at the landowner and licked.

- Senka! - Cried the landlord, but suddenly he realized ... and cried.

However, the firmness of the soul still did not leave him. Several times he was weak, but as soon as he felt that his heart was beginning to dissolve, he would now rush to the newspaper "News" and in one minute become bitter again.

- No, it's better to be wild at all, I'd rather wander through the woods with wild animals, but no one will say that the Russian nobleman, Prince Urus-Kuchum-Kildibayev, has departed from the principles!

And now he is wild. Even at this time, it was already autumn, and the frosts were decent, but he did not feel even the cold. All he, from head to foot, grew hair like an ancient Esau, and his nails turned like iron. He had long ceased to blush, he walked more and more on all fours and even wondered how he had not previously noticed that this way of walking is the most decent and most convenient. I lost even the ability to pronounce articulate sounds and learned to myself some special victorious click, the middle between whistling, hissing and barking. But the tail has not yet acquired.

He will go to his park, in which he once unwashed his body friable, white, friable, like a cat, in an instant, climbs up to the very top of the tree and watches from there. It will come running, it, the hare, will rise on hind legs and listen, whether there is no danger where - and he really here as here. Like an arrow jumping off a tree, clinging to its prey, tearing it with nails, and so with all the insides, even with the skin, and eat it.

And he became strong terribly, so strong that he even felt himself entitled to enter into friendly relations with that bear who once looked at him through the window.

- Do you want to, Mikhailo Ivanovich, hike together with the hares? - He said to the bear.

- Want - why not want to! - answered the bear, - only, my brother, you vainly destroyed this man!

- And why?

- And because the peasant of this is not more capable of an example than your brother's nobleman. And therefore I'll tell you straight: you are a stupid landowner, even though I am a friend!

Meanwhile, the captain-police officer, although patronizing the landowners, but in view of the fact that the peasant has disappeared from the face of the earth, did not dare to keep silent. Worried his report and the provincial authorities, wrote to him: "And who do you think, who will pay taxes now? who will drink wine on taverns? who will be engaged in innocent activities? "The captain-police officer answers: the treasury-de should now be abolished, and the innocent classes were abolished by themselves, instead of them, looting, robbery and murder were spread in the county. A few days ago, and his, the police chief, some bear is not a bear, a man has not nearly lifted a man in a man-bear, and he suspects that stupid landlord who is the instigator of all troubles.

The chiefs were worried and they collected the council. They decided to seize and install the peasant, but to the stupid landowner, who instigated the instigator all the time, to inspire him in the least so that he ceased his fanfaronhood and did not repair entry to the treasury of taxes.

As if on purpose, at that time, a swarm of peasants flew through the provincial town and showered the entire market square. Now this grace was drawn, put in a whip and sent to the district.

And suddenly again there was a smell in that county chaff and sheepskins; but at the same time flour and meat and livestock appeared on the market, and taxes were received in one day so that the treasurer, seeing such a heap of money, only threw up his hands in surprise and cried out:

- And where are you taking the rascals from!

"What has become of the landowner, however?" The readers will ask me. To this I can say that although with great difficulty, he was also caught. Caught, immediately blew out, washed and cut off their nails. Then the captain of the police corrected him properly, took the newspaper "News" and, having entrusted his supervision to Senka, left.

He is alive to this day. Lay out gruppjans, yearn for his former life in the woods, wash himself only under compulsion and sometimes mooch.